Groupie...my true calling in life.

I knew that I chose the right place to intern at. Thanksgiving Point is great. Especially when they put on AWESOME concerts by bands that I LOVE! Last night was case and point. Secondhand Serenade came last night. And I love them. A lot.

Working for the venue has a LOT of perks. This includes:

-Free food.

-Free entrance.

-Driving the golf cart (not walking all over the entire park the entire night is quite a relief).

-Driving band members in the golf cart.

-Getting free CDs.

-Driving JOHN VESELY of SECONDHAND SERENADE to the bathroom.

-Becoming BFFs with John...maybe not BFFs, but we were tight. Bathrooms allow for great bonding time.

-Hanging out with attractive band members.

-Being the envy of everyone because I get to stand right next to the stage and not behind the barricades.

-Plus many more.

And. Just to make everyone more jealous. I will now put up pictures of my awesome night.

Just me and Cait chilling at the concert.

Meet John. He IS Secondhand Serenade. And my lover.

Cait backstage.

Just chilling backstage. AWESOME.

MMM...there he is again.

And again.

This is Jonathan. My other lover. I have a thing for men with that name. He is the lead singer of We Shot the Moon, formerly Waking Ashland. And totally cool.

Last night=BEST NIGHT EVER. Loved it. Once again, it is ok to be jealous of me. =)

Blogging Block.

I am having a blogging writer's block. I have started 3 different posts and got bored. Hmmmmmmmm....what to say? I wish I had something witty and exciting to post about. Or some deep insights into life. But no. There is nothing.

One day I will get my blogging talent back...

Brother for Sale...only 50 cents!

Bah hah Mary Kate and Ashley movies...LOVE THEM.

And by "Brother", I really mean APARTMENT IN LOGAN! I am selling my apartment contract in Logan for the 2009/2010 school year.

This place is AWESOME. Seriously. I love love loved living there last year and wish it had worked out that I could live there again. I loved being able to wake up 20 minutes before class started, leave 5 minutes before class started, and be ON TIME! Best thing ever.

The apartment is literally 2 minutes walking distance from campus. It is HUGE. My bedroom had so much space that I didn't know how to fill it all! I had a walk-in closet, my own bathroom, a gorgeous view of the Logan Valley. And...the apartment has its own washer and dryer. And utilities is included in the price. Awesome! I loved not having to haul all of my laundry home or pay for a laundromat. Plus...the people who live there are pretty cool too.

There are a lot of things I loved about this place. I so wish that things had worked out for me to be there again. It is a little more expensive than some of the other places up there, but it is TOTALLY worth it. If you or anyone you know might be interested or have any questions, PLEASE let me know. It would help me out a TON.

Gracias! =)

despair.

I'm not one who usually broadcasts about my problems. Sometimes I don't feel like I have anyone to talk to about what is going on in my life because no one understands. It has gotten to the point where I just need to get my feelings out, and it looks like this is the only way I feel I can really do that without worrying that I am making somebody feel bad or making someone feel sorry for me. I am not looking for sympathy or pity. This is another one of those posts to make myself feel a little better. Maybe that is a little selfish. But it is my blog and I can do whatever the eff I want.

It has been so hard for me to stay positive lately. The financial burden on my family has been so hard. I try not to get involved or try not to worry but when it causes this much stress, it is hard to ignore. I don't even know if I can go back to school in the fall. And that breaks my heart. I complain constantly when I am in Logan about how much I hate being there and how much I want to be done with school, but I want to go back to school so bad. I love my family and I love being home...that is why I come home almost every weekend. But sometimes I need to get away. Living with roommates and being out on my own is so freeing.

I wish that I could do more to help my parents out. I do my best not to ask for money to go out or for clothes. I try to help around the house to relieve some stress. But sometimes it seems like it isn't enough. I looked and looked for a job and finally found one...I work 2 hours next week. At $6.75/hour. That doesn't even pay for my gas. I love my internship, but I put so much work and so many hours into something that I don't get anything out of except experience. Sometimes it seems like such a waste to me.

I just want life to turn around for us. Isn't it our turn for some relief? I try not to be negative. I try to be so grateful for the things that I have and the blessings in my life.

Life is just hard.

train. freaking. wreck.

Emotionally, that is. I can't stop crying, no matter how hard I try. Even when I am in a really good mood, I am crying. It's weird.

This past Friday was the 3 year mark of my dear, sweet Grandma passing away. (Here the tears come again) And it has been really hard on me this year. I had gotten to the point where I could go visit my Grandpa and see her stuff and not get all emotional. I was making progress...must have been one of those 2 steps forward, 1 step back kind of progression.

My mom's side of the family has a HUGE family reunion every year over Father's Day weekend, which happened to be this weekend this year. I was so excited. I love love love love love my extended family. And I am so sad that I don't get to see the majority of them more than once a year...they really are so great. And I love being up at the old homestead in Kilgore, Idaho. If you are not related and you have heard of it, I will give you a cookie. It is this little tiny place that doesn't mean anything except to those people who have had the pleasure of spending time there. I love it up there, but this year was especially hard. I was having a great time visiting, but there was always that sadness in the back of my mind and in my heart.

And to make it worse, since I was super emotional, I was letting the littlest things bother me. Which, in turn, brings out things that aren't so little that I have been holding inside for a long time. When I was younger, anytime I would get into an argument with my sister or my cousins, my Grandma would always know the right thing to say to make me feel better. And I always knew that what she was saying was true, because she would never tell a lie if her life depended on it. And what was even more great about her, is that she would make me feel better without putting anyone down. So this weekend, I was not getting along with my sisters. When I tried to talk to my mom about it, she just kinda shrugged it off and told me to let it go. That was not what I needed. And my little tiny thing that should not have even upset me snowballed into this huge ordeal. Saturday night, as I was trying to sleep, I just began sobbing. I felt like no one knew what I was going through, that I didn't fit in with my family, that I was all alone. When what I was really upset about was that my Grandma wasn't there to pull me on her lap, sing me one of her favorite hymns, and tell me how special I am.

My Grandma was an amazing lady. The nicest, kindest, sweetest lady you would ever meet. Even when her Parkinson's progressed to the point she could barely leave the house, she always made sure to send out the grandkids birthday cards, or call the ladies in the ward just to see how they are doing. It was really hard for me to watch her the last couple of years because the Parkinson's Disease had taken away who my Grandma really was. But once in awhile, I was fortunate to witness one of those "clear moments" when she was able to be that sweet little lady again.

I miss her a lot. Especially this weekend. And other moments when I feel like nothing is going right in my life. She is one of the biggest reasons I am who I am today. She has touched my life and shaped me to a point that I cannot even explain. And I cannot wait for the day when I get to see her again.

I wish that my own computer was working so I could put a picture of her up, but just know that she is beautiful.

POVERTY.

I am SO broke. But such is life. Maybe one day I will get a job. If I didn't love my internship so much and wasn't so dedicated to it, it might be a little easier to find one. But that is besides the point. Just because I am ridiculously poor doesn't mean that I don't want to find SUPER FUN things to do with my friends...I just need to find free things to do. And I figure that other people are poor too. So...I have compiled this totally awesomely long list of free (or pretty freaking cheap) things I have found to do in SLC/Utah/Davis/Weber counties. Maybe it will make your life a little less boring without spending a shiz load of money.

Here we go...

>Clarke Planetarium...formerly Hansen Planetarium. The shows cost money, but admission to the exhibits and stuff is free. I went there yesterday. I think most shows cost like $8 for adults and $6 for kids.

>Utah Museum of Natural History-free on the first monday of every month. It is $7 for anyone over the age of 17, and $3.50 for ages 3-17. And it is only $2.50 if you have a student ID.

>Great Salt Lake Shorelands Bird Refuge...located up by the Farmington Bay Waterfowl Management Area and Antelope Island.

>Hill Aerospace Museum, about 5 miles South of Ogden. It is free, but donations are appreciated.

>Wheeler Historic Farm...there are wagon rides and farm chores!

>All of the awesome Church sites such as Temple Square, Tabernacle, Conference Center, Joseph Smith Memorial Building, etc...

>Brigham Young's grave...you could visit the grave and the Church sites in one day!

>Cathedral of the Madeleine...they offer tours that include the cathedral bells and the gargoyles.

>Capitol Hill and the Governor's Mansion...the mansion tours are on Tuesdays and Thursdays from 2-4pm.

>Fort Douglas Military Museum...closed Sunday, Monday, and all Federal Holidays.

>Great Salt Lake State Marina...the cost is $2, but there is swimming, picnicking, boating, and wildlife.

>International Peace Garden...open from dawn to dusk until September 30th.

>Liberty Park...this is not the druggie park.

>The Olympic Legacy Plaza Snowflake Fountain...or more likely known as the Fountains at the Gateway. I was also there yesterday.

>"This Is The Place" Heritage Park...admission to the village is free, but they have a Spring and Living History Season. For $8 (for adults) you get any (3) take home crafts, pony ride, or mini-train ride. Extra crafts or activities cost $1.

>Red Butte Gardens...$6 for adults, $4 for kids.

>Ice Blocking at Sugar House Park...a personal favorite.

>Memory Grove Park...has memorials to Utah war veterans.

>Utah Children's Museum...now known as Discovery Gateway. Admission is $8.50, and anyone over the age of 14 who is not accompanied by a child must leave a photo ID. Weird.

>Utah's Hogle Zoo...cost is $9 for adults, and $7 for kids, but totally worth it. Especially when you have a season pass and can get in free, like I do.

>Tracy Aviary...$5. Super fun, as long as the birds don't poop on you.

>Utah Museum of Fine Arts...my FAVORITE field trip of my entire life. $7...UofU students get in free!

>Timpanogos Cave...a Utah landmark. A $6 per car fee is required to get into American Fork Canyon. And guided tours of the cave cost $7.

>Salt Lake 2002 Olympic Cauldron Park...right next to Rice Eccles Stadium at the UofU.

>Kimball Art Center in Park City...closed on Tuesdays.

>Gardner Village. LOVE IT.

>Veteran's Memorial Park and it's Wild West Jordan Playground...I don't really know much about except that it has an AWESMOME playground.

>Factory Tour at Mrs. Cavanaugh's Candies Inc., Taffy Town, or Sweet Candy Company...YUM!

>Utah Botanical Center...a Utah State University creation, located in Kaysville.

>Salt Lake Art Center..."The purpose of the Salt Lake Art Center is to encourage contemporary visual artists and art which challenge and educate public perceptions of civil, social and aesthetic issues affecting society." Free. Closed Sundays and Mondays.

>Gilgal Sculpture Garden...formerly the Secret Garden of Salt Lake City, and has 12 sculptures and 70 stones carved with scriptures, poems, and literary texts.

>Springville Museum of Art-FREE

>Cabela's...lots of animals and exhibits. I love this place.

>Park City Historical Society and Museum...I take it back. It is closed for renovation.

>Park City Main Street

>Murray City Park...feed the birds!

>Chase Home Museum of Utah Folk Arts...this museum focuses on Utah artists. Support your local talent.

>Gallivan Center...starting in July, there are free concerts every week. FUN!

>Miniature Golfing...Mulligan's is at a great central location.

One time, my totally awesome YW leader Charlotte gave me this list called "NO MORE MOVIES"...I will also share this with you. Some of these things on this list may be for the more single (and by single, I mean not married) readers. Don't hate.

*Badminton Tournament

*Basketball

*BBQs/Camp Fires/Camping in one of the many canyons

*Star Gazing

*Frisbee Golf-there is a park in Murray somewhere (I am not exactly sure of the address...but I think it is on 4500 South. Maybe.)

*Bike Rides

*Card/Board Games

*Boating

*Bubble Blowing Contest

*Candy Making

*Canoeing/Kayaking

*Croquet...I freaking love croquet.

*Dutch oven cooking

*Football/Steal the Flag

*Formal Dinner (I know all you girls are DYING to ear those old prom dresses again)

*Hike

*Horse back riding

*Karaoke...LOVE IT!

*Kite Flying

*Water Fight

*Swimming

*Finger Painting

*Picnic

*Racket ball

*Sand Castle Building...HELLO DAYBREAK! Perfect little beach.

*Scavenger Hunt

*Sidewalk chalk drawing

*Softball

*Tennis

*Tubing

*Volleyball

And that is that. This list was basically for my own benefit. (I am trying to become more adventurous/spontaneous) If you hate it, well then...whatever. My friends and I are going to try to do every single thing on here by the time school starts again. Wish us luck.

Oh..if you have any other awesome FREE/CHEAP ideas, please tell me.

The End.

Boo.

I suck at this blogging thing.

That is all.