Monday, February 20, 2012

trying a little harder to be a little better...

I love to make new friends.  Seriously, it is one of my favorite things.  And I am pretty good at it, too (sometimes too good at it).  I think it is because I try not to be judgmental of the way people live their lives.

Recently, I have been feeling...off, maybe?  Just kinda feeling like I am not being the best person I can be.  And as I got looking into my life, I could see the things that were bringing me down.  A lot of things hindering me are things that I need to fix for myself.  But some of it comes from some people I have in my life.  And that makes me really sad because it is people that I spend a lot of time with, people who I am really good friends with.  And it's not like the negative things they do are HUGE things, it's all the small stuff...the swearing, the inappropriateness, the leniency with some of the standards that the Church encourages.  But all of the little things add up, and it is causing me some stress and bringing me down.

It makes me sad, but I think that I need to start purging/phasing out some of these people from my life. I am trying to make myself be the best Chelsee there is, and to do that I can't have things bringing me down.  I'm not saying I will cut them out of my life completely, because they are people that I love dearly.  But I think it is time to move on.  In the movie "This Means War" (hilarious.  I highly recommend it), Chelsea Handler encourages Reese Witherspoon to not choose the better guy, but to choose that guy that makes her a better person.  And I think it is the same with friends, too.  They should uplift and inspire, not bring us down and make us feel negative.

One reason I want to make myself better is because I 100% have no idea how to be the kind of person that guys want to date.  Like I said up there, I am REALLY good at making friends, but it never translates to something more.  Ever.  For real.  But I figure I better just make myself all the way awesome so if/when/if it does happen, I am ready for it.  This whole not dating thing has taken a huge toll on me and has hit my self-esteem hard.  So I am trying to not focus on it, and just focus on me.  I kinda suck at it, but I'm trying.

So, all of you who have already caught yourself a man, give me some man-catching advice.  K thanks. :)

The end.

6 comments:

Kateka said...

Hmmmm.... well, I personally think you are very adorable and cute and the reason you're not hitched yet has nothing to do with you and more to do with timing. Just keep being YOU, and don't feel the need to change who you are - you are doing what is right and I am confident you'll find the man who will love you JUST AS YOU ARE. :)

Katie said...

Remember that book of mine you had?!?! Did you ever read it? Well you should read it again, because really, all a guy wants, is a confidant woman who loves herself and is happy with herself. You're on the right track my friend, you'll find someone fit just for you!!!

Meggers said...

Since I havent seen you in such a long time, I thought, 'sweet, she isn't talking about me', and then I got to the swearing part...woops. But really, it's not me because I haven't seen you in a long time!

emily barlocker scott said...

I totally know how to get a man.... all you have to do is go on hotornot.com.
P.S. Please don't stop reading my blog because it's inappropriate and lenient towards church standards. It will make me sad.

Heather said...

I agree with Kateka 100%!

You are such an amazing and beautiful person inside and out. You will find the right guy when it is the right time.

And as for your last comment, all I can think of is Princess and the Frog and their "man-catching- beignets" so maybe that's what you need to do? ;)

Carly said...

Have you listened to John Bytheway's dating CD? I can email you the files if you want. I loved listening to it when I was single.